It has been raining, if not hardly, continuously outside. I hate rainy seasons like this before, but recently, I've been really calm when such seasons occur, not because of suspension of classes, which I'm not totally happy about, but because I find it amusing to feel my mind's urging to work at stuff I usually refuse to work on during normal warm days. My course requires much of my time now. If I'm not due of any paper works, there's a high percentage that I am due of reading something which actually made me realize something -- I am in fact a better reader now than I was before. I'm not completely bad in reading, in fact, as far as I remember I got my highest score in Reading Comprehension in my UPCAT test result. But believe it or not, I found it really hard to focus on reading stuff that were not of great importance to me, or those stuff that were not really appealing to my senses and moods, exactly pertaining to news. Reading newspapers is not my thing. The thought of it actually bores me. And if I try reading them I find myself thinking of other things. Now, because I was hasten to read lots and lots of books, handouts, articles etc. I was able to practice my reading skills too. It is quite funny to think that reading is a skill as well, it is a skill always taken for granted by a lot of people. For a change, I fuckin' read the news now. Seriously.
Aside from reading, I believe I gain back my passion in writing. It never occurs to me that writing is something I could just abandon and replace in my life. If in the future I choose my dream in Fine Arts, writing will still hold a special place in my heart. And if in the future I'll be a professional dancer as how I dreamt to have a studio of my own, writing will still be in my life, I know. So for months of deliberate thinking as what writing is to me, I can say writing is my comfort zone. My memory lane. My home. It isn't just a hobby nor an activity. It is something more than that. And if words can't actually suffice everything I want to say at a certain moment, I've got drawing and dancing with me too to accompany writing throughout my journey in life. I'm an artist as how my mom always defines me, which I always shake off of me because I feel so boasty to be called as such. But now I call myself an artist not because of conceit but because I know, and experienced, the perils and disadvantages of being one. And even though I fuck up most of the times because of dancing, drawing, and writing, most of the times as well I live my life the way I wanted to because of these things.
This entry is to say that I'm not abandoning this blog.
Currently listening to: Wonderful Tonight (by some videoke addicts in the neighborhood)
Currently feeling: okay
Posted July 27th, 2011 at 08:02 PM ::
